News & Notes Inside the Week in Film


Tomorrow’s News Today

In an effort to get a jump on their competitors and get more people clicking through, online news outlets are now reporting things that haven’t happened yet as facts.  Welcome to the future.

by Chris Neumer

It’s a topic I write about fairly often: the demand for news has now outstripped the supply.  Outlets that want (read: need) more page views have begun to do the only thing they can to counter this: they’ve started writing about things that aren’t exactly news (Michelle Obama rolled her eyes at something John Boehner said!). I am forever fascinated by the way the media manages to find new things to write about to create more page views for their sites without any new actual new news.  Well, there’s a new twist to this concept that I’m starting to notice more and more.  It’s not enough that entertainment writers are now predicting how critics will react to the new releases, but they’re now reporting news before it happens.

On January 17, a Thursday, boxofficemojo.com ran an article with the headline: Jessica Poised to Beat Arnold, Mark This Weekend.  The first sentence of the article read, “Arnold’s back, but it looks like Jessica [Chastain] has his number over Martin Luther King weekend.”

It does?

It looks like that?

It’s Thursday!  It may look like Chastain WILL have Arnold’s number, but that’s a far stretch from what was written.

By Saturday morning, entertainment writers were pouring over the Friday box office numbers and declaring Chastain bigger than Schwarzenegger, Wahlberg and Russell Crowe.  According to EW.com, this meant a second weekend of Chastain “[reigning] atop the box office.”  EW.com’s article went so far as to state that Zero Dark Thirty’s $4.6 million on Friday “[guaranteed] Chastain both first and place” for the weekend.  I realize that there are formulas that studios have to extrapolate entire weekend box office numbers from Friday’s totals, but for a major journalistic outlet to ‘guarantee’ that two movies would finish atop the charts three days later seems like a bit of a leap.

By Monday morning, the weekend totals were in and writers began parsing what they meant, an impressive feat given that the three-day weekend wasn’t actually over at this point.  ew.com’s box office story actually began with this sentence: “As reported yesterday, Jessica Chastain accomplished the rare feat of simultaneously starring in both the number one and number two movies in the country this weekend…”  Not only were they writing an article about the weekend box office before the weekend was over, they were citing an even earlier story in their recap!

What makes this reporting all the more interesting is that the actual numbers aren’t anything like the early predictions.  In boxofficemojo.com’s January 17th article, the one that announced that Chastain has Schwarzenegger’s number, they predicted that Mama would win the weekend with a $16.9 million take, The Last Stand would come in third with $14 million and Broken City would come in fourth with $13.2 million.  About that… Mama did take the top spot, but actually pulled in $28.5 million.  Broken City came in fifth, taking in $8.3 million while The Last Stand came in ninth with a $6.2 million haul.  I mean, they were only off on Mama by about 60%, The Last Stand by about 55% and Broken City by about 50%.  Politicians complain about polls or stories featuring a three percent plus or minus deviation.  What I’m talking about here is a margin of error of +/- 50%!  That’s hard to comprehend.

The icing on this cake came with ew.com’s recap.  EW.com not only published its weekend recap before the end of the weekend but managed to also make a statement about how the new films would do the next weekend.  “Given [Mama’s] weak “B-“ CinemaScore grade and the horror genre’s frontloaded nature… Mama will nosedive from here.  It may perform in the same range as last October’s Paranormal Activity 4.”

Unless, you know, it doesn’t.

 


The Last Fail

The Last Stand opened with a $6.2 million weekend take.  If Lionsgate is looking for an explanation for this huge flop, they may want to turn their attention to the 180 the film’s promotional materials took in December.

by Chris Neumer

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s first above-the-title movie in nearly a decade, The Last Stand, opened this last weekend and failed with a speed and precision normally reserved for Porsche’s in the left lane of the autobahn.  It took in a little less than $6.2 million, for a roughly $2,100 per theater average.  That latter number put it on par with Skyfall, which is in its 11thweek of release.

There is a lot of speculation about what went wrong that is mostly focused on Schwarzenegger being A) old and B) not good.  The movie itself wasn’t great (57% positive on rottentomatoes.com), but it certainly wasn’t horrible either.  It had a higher CinemaScore than Mama, which did more than four times the business that The Last Stand did. One possible reason that certainly seems like it should be mentioned is the nearly 180-degree turn that the film’s marketing took sometime in the fourth quarter of 2012. When the project’s first promotional materials came out in mid-August, their tone was one of hardcore, badass action.  The Last Stand’s poster was a gothic work of genius with some Chevy product placement thrown in.  Schwarzenegger stood tall in the poster, holding a large weapon.  The film’s tagline, “Not in his town.  Not on his watch.” dictated that Schwarzenegger was going to be taking a, yes, stand against bad guys.  The trailer featured a bass heavy sound mix with an emphasis on action sequences and explosions.

When The Last Stand’s latest promotional materials were released in mid-December, there was a rather major and obvious tone shift: the focus was now almost cartoonish.  And not in a good way.  One of the new posters was actually a comic strip and the other new poster moved co-star Johnny Knoxville’s name above the title with Schwarzenegger’s.  The new trailer replaced the menacing bass heavy sound of the original with a “Bad to the Bone” like guitar riff and cut out some of the action in favor of more comedy and Knoxville laughing like an idiot.    Voiceover was also added to the new trailer, with copy suggesting that this was now an 80’s comedy.  “To save their town, this unlikely team is bringing out the big guns.”

Really?

The only thing missing from the new trailer was Schwarzenegger hitting Knoxville over the head with a frying pan and a clown horn going off.  The seriousness and big time action of the first wave of marketing was replaced with a jokey, almost ridiculous tone that has never quite worked for Schwarzenegger.

If the folks at Lionsgate want to know why The Last Stand only managed a putrid $6.2 million its opening weekend, this unusual about-face in the marketing seems well worth investigating.

 


Barterin’ and Banterin’

The exchanges between Seth McFarlane and Emma Stone during the Oscar nomination announcements were awkward.  And if anybody should know good banter, it’s Stone.

by Chris Neumer

Seth McFarlane and Emma Stone were called upon this year to announce the Oscar nominations.  For anyone who watched the telecast (which can be seen here), there were some unusual and downright awkward exchanges between the two hosts.  It was such an off-putting beginning to the nomination announcements that I began speculating about whether McFarlane hated Stone and was doing what he could to be a dick to her.  When introducing Stone, McFarlane said, “Emma Stone is the star of the new film Gangster Squad…”  He then turned to her and continued, “I’m not sure you’re the star, that seems like an ensemble piece to me.”  Her response?  “Just keep reading.”

As I wrote in my Nomination Reaction piece, there’s an art to (supposedly) witty banter and it doesn’t consist of one person repeatedly putting down the other.  I then went on to explain how the set up for good banter works.  What I did not, however, realize is that Stone herself knows exactly how good banter works as well.  How do I know this?  Because Stone bantered about what good banter is during her banter with her Oscar co-presenter, Ben Stiller, during the 2012 ceremony, a little less than a year ago.

Stated Stone to Stiller: “We should have some banter.  Where you act cocky and I shut you down and you say I look pretty and I say, “No chance, funny boy.” And everybody laughs at you but you seem okay with it.”

Exactly!

 

The Photo of the Week


The Rock Gets His Ass Kicked in The Rundown

 


The 5 Things I Learned This Week

Fascinatingly true things to broaden your mind

 

1) The Hush Sound and The Hold Steady are two completely different musical groups.

2) Paula Abdul has a Greatest Hits album.

3) The first track on the CD “Total Girl Rock School” is by the Jonas Brothers.

4) One of the tracks on the Airplane soundtrack is the “Notre Dame Victory March”.

5) Rapper Kelis is female.

 

 

This Week’s Stories

New Releases

End of Watch

THE PLAYERS: Starring Jake Gyllenhaal, Michael Pena, and Anna Kendrick; written and directed by David Ayer; Released by Universal. Rated R.

THE PLOT: In a documentary style feature, a camera crew follows two LA cops who go up against the criminal underworld.

THE SKINNY:
+ Michael Pena is an interesting actor who doesn’t get anywhere near the recognition or credit that he is due.  He’s a Hispanic Sam Rockwell.  Pena is a likeable lead and extremely versatile.  He can play good, bad, intelligent, stupid, wacky, dramatic and comedic.  And he does a fantastic job here too.
– There is going to come a time, and hopefully soon, where screenwriters will stop giving one of the leads in buddy cop movies newborn kids.  I realize that this is done to heighten the tension and make the audience more sympathetic to the character, but I’ve officially stopped caring.  I think cops with newborn kids in action movies are now actually a red flag for a project.
+ This film is written and directed by David Ayer.  If anyone gets the Los Angeles police department, it’s Ayer.  He has written and/or directed Training Day, Harsh Times, S.W.A.T., Dark Blue, Street Kings and The Fast and the Furious.  You can put that list of films up against any other list of cop films and it will come out on top.  When you have a niche, you have a niche.
+ Jake Gyllenhaal is a very competent actor who has developed a knack for having a screen presence while not saying anything.  He is a commanding figure and one that adds greatly to this film.
+ Oh, yeah, this film is pretty damn good.

YES, IT’S TRUE: The word “fuck” is used 326 times in this film.

For a Good Time, Call…

THE PLAYERS: Starring Ari Graynor, Lauren Miller, and Justin Long; written by Lauren Miller and Katie Anne Naylon; directed by Jamie Travis. Released by Focus. Rated R.

THE PLOT: Two roommates start a phone sex line in order to pay for rent.

THE SKINNY:
– Yes, those phone sex operators you call are actually really smoking hot twenty-somethings in full hair and makeup with college degrees from prestigious universities.  And they want you.
– I hate movies where actors play characters who have the same name as they do.  If Lauren Anne Miller is playing a character, is it that much to ask that the character’s name not also be Lauren?
– This movie seems very akin to an 80s family sit-com.  Sure, it deals with phone sex, but it does so in such a light-hearted and illogical fashion that it doesn’t seem as though it’s based in any sort of reality with which I’m familiar.  I’m not saying that two completely inexperienced phone sex operators with no business acumen wouldn’t be able to start pulling in hundreds of thousands of dollars a year after a few weeks of running their company with no—wait, that’s exactly what I’m saying.  This is only able to happen because people somewhere are making shit up.  You can do this when you can make shit up, you can’t do it in real life.
– There are numerous scenes of the two women acting surprised at things that shouldn’t be surprising to anyone with a brain.  This got old in the trailer.

YES, IT’S TRUE: This film was shot in only sixteen days.

The Paperboy

THE PLAYERS: Starring Matthew McConaughey, Zac Efron, and Nicole Kidman; written and directed by Lee Daniels. Released by Millennium.  Rated R.

THE PLOT: A reporter investigates a crime in order to prove the innocence of a man on death row.

THE SKINNY:
+ All of you people out there clamoring for a movie where Nicole Kidman finally pees on someone?  The drought is now over.
– It’s almost like director Lee Daniels took a poll to find out which actors would sound the worst with southern accents (Kidman, John Cusack, Zac Efron) and then intentionally cast them in this movie.
– It’s also almost like Daniels took a poll to find out which actors would generate the least amount of audience sympathy and put them in the leads and which actors would generate the most amount of audience sympathy and made them the bad guys.
– I remember a time when Kidman wasn’t just viewed as a legitimate and talented actress, but also as an actress who could actually open a movie.  Man, have things changed.  Interestingly, Kidman seems to be at a very similar point in her career as Tom Cruise: both actors now seem to be playing parodies of themselves.  Suffice it to say, her work in The Paperboy feels hollow.
+ The Paperboy has this going for it: it has one of the more interesting bits of trivia that I’ve encountered with a project in a while.  It is based on a true story… and its screenplay was adapted from a fictional novel.
– Everyone sweats in this movie all the time.  Air conditioning might not have been historically accurate, but it would have been genuinely appreciated.  I mean, what possible reason could there be to have a movie with Efron and Matthew McConaughey constantly shirtless and glistening?

YES, IT’S TRUE: There are currently over 3,000 people on death row in the US.

Searching For Sugar Man

THE PLAYERS:  Starring Rodriguez, Steve Segerman, and Dennis Coffey; written and directed Malik Bendjelloul.  Released by Focus Features.  Rated R.

THE PLOT: A Documentary following two South African men as they search for the 1970’s rock artist, Rodriguez.

THE SKINNY:
– Don’t read this title too quickly; it’s not Searching for Sugar Mama.
+ This is one of those new style, American documentaries that is both entertaining and warm.
+ It’s funny how much the Internet has changed our lives.  Late sixties and early seventies musician, Rodriguez, got huge in South Africa during the seventies and eighties… and had no idea about it.  And really, living in Detroit, why would he know that?  It wasn’t until the late nineties that Rodriguez learned about his fame in Africa and his life changed.  It’s a very strange concept: you’re a well respected musician and activist… only you don’t know it.  This may be the exact opposite of Kim Kardashian.  I’m going to have to investigate.
+ This movie made numerous top ten lists for the year and is nominated for an Academy Award for Best Documentary.

YES, IT’S TRUE: Rodriguez was born Sixto Diaz Rodriguez.  The name Sixto was chosen because he was the sixth child of his parents.

The New Releases were written by Chris Neumer and Kevin Withers